The unwanted branches

Few meters from my home I find myself stuck in sort of a traffic jam,a rare occurrence on that road. My mind was quick to imagine few scenarios like some wrongly parked vehicle obstructing the traffic flow or an accident. As I trudged forward realized that my imagination was quiet of the mark and it was something else. Felled of tree branches were blocking a section of the road there by effecting the traffic flow. My initial assessment was that it was the effect of last night's heavy rain, until it stuck me that last night was more of a down pour sans strong wind. That was when I observed couple of man axing the branches of another tree few steps ahead. An oncoming procession helped me connect the dots, that its the start of the Vinayaka Nimarjan days.  

Cutting down the branches of trees which seem to obstruct the processions taken out during these days, especially with ever increasing size of the idols is something which has been a practice since long. It does seem to make sense that the effort is to allow a smoother passage and avoid any inconvenience to the procession and the general traffic as well. But this is where I have a problem. Trees might be the single most factor which contribute towards keeping the environment as the way it ought be, It does not sound so logical when one thinks these branches ( and in some cases , Trees ) to be removable obstacles to facilitate some thing which would be lasting a few days. It would not be until the next year that we would have these Nimarjan processions. Is it worth to fell of the branches ? it does take a lot of resources for the branches to develop and a re investment for the tree in growing back the branches , which in turn might be felled off in the future again for the very same reasons. 

It would be unreasonable on my part to blame the folks axing them down as their effort was more on to facilitate something to prevent a further problem. This has to be treated on a  larger scale. Can we not be more conscious of the environment and make an effort to see the idols can be on the smaller end so not to have these hazzles. I am pretty much sure that the size of the idol and the blessings are not in any direct proportion. While an awakening and cognizance towards the nature on an individual level is much appreciated , there is also a bigger role to be played by the administration to bring into effect the laws restricting on the size of the idols as well as to create an awareness campaign of developing sensitivity on these. 

Two lives which never nor meant to be "lived"

An inadvertent turn I took while starting off home from office, made me glance at the pavement where two kids were playing. Sort of familiar faces, but more familiar were the other two faces of their slightly elder siblings . Two faces which I ought be able to remember only from memory for I would never be able to see them again. A recent drowning incident took away the lives of those two elder siblings, guess they would be around 8 & 10 years old. Was that an accident ? I don't think so , for an accident is something which we don't expect to happen, but this tragedy has always been a question of "when" ? 

That particular spot on pavement, has always been a sore sight for me. A couple resides over there with their children since many a year, sort of becoming their fixed residence. I see these kids nearly everyday, especially the two elder ones. Sometimes I buy them breakfast or something else, sometimes give away some change and many a time shoo them away. Me shooing would not matter much to them as sooner or later they would find someone else to give in to their demands. Their innocent antics are sort of an amusement, which many other of my office mates out for their breaks would vouch for. The visual of the younger of two always pulling up his pants which never seem to stick to his waist, lingers in my mind. But every time I saw these kids, the callousness of their parents  in leaving them to the streets gets reflected. Their financial plight would have made them to leave these two kids to the streets but what bewilders me is they managed to have two more kids knowing very well that they would not be able to provide them with even the basics of life. The way these kids were set loose, the tragedy was always a time bomb ticking. On that fateful day the kids along with couple of other friends managed to go until the backwaters of Tankbund which is a couple of Kilometers away, for a swim. Not knowing how to swim they drowned in it. I just wonder, when would have their parents realized them missing ? or did they not even bother until the news reached them. 

Whenever I used to pass by the pavement along with my friend, we always had this question, does any one have a moral right of bringing a child into this world knowing the limits of they providing for them. I think, talking of moral right is a far fetched thought but at least basic common sense or for that matter the fear of bearing additional burden. The other aspect of this incident is that the administration was swift in putting up barriers at all access points to water sources in the area ( much appreciated) but what they seem to have missed is that a 8 and a 10 year old kid should not have been at that spot in the first place, they ideally should have been in a school. Do not know if this incident has provoked an action even in that direction. 

Who is accountable for the lives lost ? parents ? circumstances ? society which forced the circumstances ? lack of a support system for the under privileged ? Could I have done something better, seeing and knowing the plight of these kids for many a year ? 

Another thought troubles me as to what was the purpose of their lives ? they never got a decent chance to live ... were their lives ever meant to be lived ?

The saddest part of the whole thing,in-spite of the incident I see the other two siblings going around freely as was with their elder ones. 

Alas !!! Child Labour seems better....

Its been many an hour, but could not shake away the images from my thoughts....It was the regular evening break with my friend. As we were sipping tea and talking of things at work and other usual stuff, a kid pops up with a paper in his hand, mute and deaf, requesting for money. My personal rule  of not to encourage kids asking for alms, sort of  made me turn a blind eye to him, but my friend being of a more kinder nature gave him some coins and sent the kid, a bit happier, on his way. In no time a girl turns up, mute and deaf (acting ???), slightly elder than the kid and has another copy of the same paper, my dear friend obliged to pull up few coins for her, she would not accept it but in her own mute way signals for more money. Being a bit elder to the kid, she seems to know that the coins would not suffice. We sort of managed to send her away. Looking around, could see a bunch of kids with the paper in hand and asking for money from others who landed there for their evening break. As we started to make our way back into the office, the earlier kid turned up, with his request and my friend subtly reminding that we paid our dues to him, but the kid obviously in no mood to remember that. I tried to avoid and move away but the kid sort of clung on to me , continuing with his requests. I somehow manged to get clear past him. While I struggled physically to be away from that kid, deep within some cords sort of bonded to that guy. His persistence reminded me of my neighbor's kid who clings on to me with his persistent demands which many a time I give into. 

This made me wonder, if the the innocent and persistent demanding made me remember my neighbor's kid and made me strike a chord with this guy, why did it not make me give in to the demands ? Why did not I feel to at least pull up some coins and give it to him ? I many a time go out of my way getting things for the neighbor's kid , there is some non-explainable happiness that one gets when a kid is happy , especially because of you . I believe that is where the answer lies. Irrespective of what I do or how much ever I give this kid, that would never bring this guy the proportional happiness or cheer that I manage to bring out in my neighbor's kid every time i turn up with a chocolate bar or something. 

The way these kids went about with their thing amused me. The younger ones going about with it as more of a play, and the slightly elder ones a more business oriented approach. One thing  which seems to be common is their Innocence, albeit various levels of it. Level of innocence being indirectly proportional to the experience they seem to carry. On one hand is the innocence of my neighbor's kid which exploits me to give into his demands and other is the innocence which gets exploited for the demands of those greedy lurking in the dark shadows extending that darkness into the lives of these kids.
Long back I wrote on child labor, about a kid who seems to be losing out on his childhood working at a tea stall. But when I look at these kids the earlier one's life seems to be in a better situation, at least he works for his family and whatever he manages to earn goes for himself and his kin.On contrary what about these kids ? whose burden are they carrying ? whose sin are they paying for ?
This is where the evil of child labour seems better !!!!

India - A work of assimilation !!

Nationalism has a tricky paradox to it. On one side it seems to offer a unified definition and identity while on the other, narrowing the scope of a much wider national character. Unless tread carefully it is quite prone for nationalistic spirit to take a narrower view. A recent trend albeit not a new one but something which found a renewed brazenness is to redefine nationalism, more specific a redefinition of " what is Indian ?" Alas it seems to be the narrower one. Diversity is one of the most ominous attribute anyone would associate with India, so it does sound a bit appalling when a narrowed version of it surfaces.
History, especially modern history is replete with nations forming on ethnic lines . India in its attempt to free itself from the colonial rule also managed to gain an unified national identity , and due credit ought to go to those great leaders who so craftily managed to inculcate a nationalistic spirit but also ensured it was not a narrower one but envisioned a diverse nation true to what India has been all through its long history. It is so truly said the people of India are so much a mixed stock that it is very tough to trace back a single ethnic origin. Surprisingly enough India also happens to be the only culture where any common Indian of present age can so effortlessly connect and has an understanding of the Ancient India of yore. (Basham says, the same cannot be be said of other ancient civilizations eg. Egypt )
So, now the question arises as to what is it that enables the idea of India to be diverse and yet manages to find a singular connect to the past ? As Nehru, states in "Discovery of India", notices, India has been a culture of assimilation. Wave after wave of people have entered India, few finding a new home, few other purely to conquer but the bounty of character that this nation has that it was able to assimilate them. With this assimilating history spread across thousands of years that it does sound queer to zone out something of the present nation only to be Indian and something else as alien. It becomes a real tough task to pinpoint a time in History at which one identifies as to be a true representation of a period which defines as being Indian and anything after that to be alien. Even if we rule out Islam & Christianity ( Based on the attempted new definition ) as not being Indian, one is still left with quite a labyrinth to maneuver his way. If we talk about something originated on this side of Indus to be the standard, what do we say of the Aryans ? In spite of Sangh & Co fringe elements insistence of Aryans having Indian origin, enough evidences are found wherein the homeland of Aryans is said to be Central Eurasia. Why does not Buddhism & Jainism, two clear product of Indian thought does not seem to be part of the so called pseudo nationalist's renewed zeal. If the Geographical extent is based, Buddhist thought, for example seems to be more Indian than Aryan culture. Was Hinduism , that we talk of now, practiced by the people of Indus Valley Civilization ? in all probability it was not , since it was much prior to Vedic culture. So those who want us Indians to go back to origins , shouldn't they be looking at that period and might be the still unknown and not excavated ancient  antiquity of people of this land.
Wonder those who speak of Hinduism , have any understanding of it they in reality mean by it.  If they refer Hinduism to be a socio - cultural way and tall claims are being recounted of the greatness of India's past and its achievements , why isn't there a look back at those multitudes of outcasts treated as untouchables for thousands of years, the most heinous crime humanity can impose on humanity ? If the emergence of Islam or Christianity is treated to be breaking the social fabric, why don't we talk of all the persecutions bestowed upon each other in the name of various Gods of Hindu pantheon, example can be said of the struggle between the Shivites and Vishnavites of which there is enough of bloodied history on record. The evil of caste system which forms the integral psyche of an Indian. If a case is made of Hinduism as a religion,why doesn't the fringe groups which make a fuss of movies like OMG & PK , realize that the great modern day reviver of Aryan Ideology  , Swami Dayanada Saraswati himself was against Idol Worship. Do they realize Adi Shankarachrya's Advaita speaks about finding God within self, not in blind ritual at some temple ? If Vedas are to be the cornerstone, should not Lord Indra be the most revered GOD ? because he is the supreme deity in the Vedas and of the Vedic people. Our Vedic ancestors do not even have a knowledge of the Supreme Hindu trinity of Brahma , Vishnu & Shiva , so where do these three come into picture , if they were not at the origin of Indian spiritual thought ? a product of much later manifestation of our thought.
One cannot just be cherry picking all the good things and showcase a grand image of something, That can never be a truer definition. To all the great upholders of  your version of India and Hinduism, please define what you stand for first and then we can talk of integrating rest into your thought.
The beauty of India has been it diversity, the freedom  and the broad minded character, let us not narrow it.  The only way around is looking forward, grow correct , accept new thought, try correct the evils that existed and move on. Let the assimilation of thought, culture and faith continue as it has been for thousands of years.

Thought of her

The thought of her brings on a smile,

A feeling more than anything worthwhile,

It is like surge from deep within,

A sense earlier I was not akin.

Builds up a deep urge to see her,

Spend some time as I did with no other.

The heart yearns to have a talk,

And go on long solemn walk.

However what matters it is not how I feel, 

But does she truly think it to be a real deal.

Need to curb on my instinct to takes chances,

For I don’t want to trouble her with my advances.

All I want her is to really feel,

And shed her inhibitions like a peal.

Until this feeling becomes mutual and innate,

I think would have to really wait.

It is sort of a struggle and pain,

But something I have to lest I lose her in vain.

Such a folly I would never commit,

For she is the one I love in true spirit.

Imbalanced World_action over nuetrality

One of the perplexing aspects which also happens to be the most visible one in this world, happens to be the dissimilarity and the paradoxes that exist.More than its existence the revelation of these is more perplexing, for they seem to be always existing and only manifest before our eyes ( rather we realize ) only on some specific instances. There are couple of things about these that bother me. 

The first one their very existence. I fail to fathom why the Grand Master has designed or allowed these dissimilarity to creep into his creation. I would not want to tow onto the line of evolution which would might be provide an answer for the differences but would question the existence of the Supreme. I do have enough proofs and more than that Faith that there exists The ONE all above us. So why did HE allow this ? was it in the initial plan or crept in at a later stage. Does it  have the similarity to Newton's first law of motion, wherein things are at rest or uniform motion until an external force acts upon. So did something happen as the time passed by that has created dissimilarities in the world GOD has created. In spite of the origin the fact is HE knows. So what does HE want us to do in regard to these dissimilarities. When I look into my own life i seem to be sometimes the reason, others the bearer and many other times a neutral to these.

This is where I have my other troubling thought.We seems to be in a quite peculiar state of "Knowing but not realizing". We are not ignorant of the dissimilarities, but many a time we do not realize them. Either we support because of the advantage, rant when dealt a raw hand, and in most of the cases do not care. The first two i give it the the cyclic law of balancing but the aspect of being neutral is what disturbs me. These dissimilarities might be caused because of someone at advantage or others lagging behind due to various reasons, but their survival is surely on those larger group of neutrals.

This is where I see the purpose of GOD, not to remain neutral but to try even the things.This thought to look at the world beyond neutrality would reveal these imbalances to us. To view and to action, as in the movie " Evan Almighty" , One Act of Random Kindness, all it takes is one act towards restoring the balance back. And that could be anyone. GOD is the original equal opportunity provider :-)

Let Go

Man seems to forever in chase and pursuit ,in spite of the things he currently has.  Does it have any thing to do with the nomadic early life style where in man was forced to be in pursuit of food and a comfortable place to dwell , is left to debate. What amuses me is that it never ceases. There have many a scholarly works on this aspect hence i would not dwell much into man and his never ending desire. But the thought I am pondering over is how many times or at which point does man realize that the pursuit is futile. This thought was something i pondered earlier as well, one such reflection being my write up "False Hope".That was a more optimistic approach, where in I felt pursuit was of paramount importance, but over the years I realized that more than " Ceaseless pursuit " the understanding to "Let go" is a more viable and more apt thing to do. However that's where the trouble is. 

Pursuing something needs grit, and a never say die attitude, but in many a cases a foolish stubbornness can also be disguised under the aforesaid wonderful words. But the intelligence to let go things seems to be something we cannot disguise or dupe.Apart from those instances of despair where you feel defeated, it does take a bit of wisdom driven intelligence to know when to let go off things. Even in the moment of despair the realization that this is it and letting go things is better than clinging foolishly and bearing further loss.

This is something I myself ought to learn, there are many a things that I ought to let go and many others that I am yet to realize. My nature in itself ought be tuned to this aspect. Might be the realization dawned upon me to think and scribble these words are the initial steps towards learnin

g to Let go things.

The Outsider_an unknown identity

Having no identity of his own, nor interested to have one,he strutted along in this mystic world. Those identities looked so narrow, sounded so funny to have one. The order of the society did not make much logic. Like a mirror does he reflect the people around him, like water does he assimilate into any thing that he is mixed up with.People loved him, admired him, treated him to be one of them.So did he reciprocate the love and the admiration. It did not matter who the other person was, for he himself did not consider to be any different. 

He was told of the differences in the world. The various class and creed that the society is made. Was many a time warned by his so called kin to be careful. But his vision of humanity was different. For him all were humans, being part of a larger good. The acceptance he got made him believe in the humanity, so did he threw a wry smile at his kin , who said he would always be linked to this identity. He was no less than any one he met, one of the finest that you would get. There was no aspect of him which would show any sign of being any lower, as the society would dictate. But all through this, he still remained an enigma. Behind all the smiles and affection showered, the questions did linger in the minds of the people, as to what was his identity. 

Life does have stranger ways.

The order, proves to be too strong for any individual to defy. The thoughts do remain glorious, but the practicality of it ? the world does not appreciate it. In spite of his disdain for any identity, he is still categorized as one. Not based on his virtue, not on his deeds, purely basing on his birth. People still admire and love him, but not as one of their own . He never understood this paradox. 

He draws a similarity from the nature,The crow never seems to appreciate the cuckoo for its virtue, for it is not its breed. The worse part, he was never the replaced egg, or does the world treat him to be one. Pondering on this paradox of the strange world, and not ready to live with the identity the world has bestowed, there seems to be one identity he would have to take and the one he seems to always be considered,,,,,The Outsider.

Wounded hope

Its been nearly half year, and how quickly the time does past. That fateful evening still remains to be a night mare. Etched in my memory like a wound which ought never heals. That sense of helplessness still grips me. Only thing I do not cry as much as I did earlier. It is not because I overcame the grief nor that I forgot it, purely because I no more have the strength to cry. I really cannot reconcile with self. All the conscious attempts that I made to overcome this have turned futile. I want to come out of this, I want to move on, or in reality DO I, really want to. The thought suddenly comes, irrespective of what I am doing, or where I am, rendering me helpless and making me to silently mourn. There have been heartbreaks earlier, but none which has been sustained for so long. I repent for every moment that I made you feel bad. It was that sense of confidence that I have you for life, made me a bit foolish in the way I did treat you. I just hope if only I did not waste those moments. I do eagerly waited for so long, just to meet you and see you for those couple of hours. Surely they were the happiest moments. I ever had. I am waiting dear, for past many months for you to just respond. I go about with an anticipation that might be I would see you. I know it is my stupidity to hope. I never really understood what transpired. Things happened so quickly that I still do not get a sense of reality. I do not want answers as to what has happened; I just want to see you, once. Time does not always heal. 

Own Destiny_does it exist ?

How can someone create their own destiny?


When the present is influenced by past which he wasn’t responsible for,

When an action by someone still has a profound reaction on the present,

When every step taken in the present is dictated by a step of the past,

Can someone be oblivious of all things around and achieve what one wants to?

Why does one have to strive and bear the result of someone else action,

Why our destinies are for ever tied to someone else?

Can someone survive without these bonds?

Is it GOD willed or man made?

How much can I determine my future the way I want?

If I am asking these questions, should I even think that fulfillment of my dream would instigate the same questions in someone else?

Greatest Indian after Gandhi !! my take on the top 50 nominations !!

When I saw the initial Advts of " The Greatest Indian after Mahatma " on the TV, was quite excited. The first aspect which impressed me was excluding Mahatma from the competition and claiming him to be the greatest Indian, well who else could it be . I waited quite eagerly to have a look at the 50 Great Indian nominations. When finally the list was out, there were few obvious greats who I expected them to be. And surprised that quite a many I anticipated did not.
The initial reaction I had after reviewing the list was "these people managed to have a representation from all fields ". I expected the nominations to be skewed towards politicians , entrepreneurs and social leaders but seems to have a good number from sports , arts etc. Well that isn't much of a concern except that i expected the nominatiions to be more closer to the real picture rather than mere representation.
I am bewildered with a few exclusions, some one like P.V Narsimha Rao, I expected him to be part of the the list. If there is one person who has influenced India in the last two decades it has to be him.
APJ Abdul Kalam is categorised under political leaders which does not make much sense to me. Might be i could give him credit for an administrator and scientist but not as a political leader. If exclusion of P.V Narsimha rao was due to the controversies during his reign, why was Lal Bahadur Shastri excluded ? a man of integrity , and the one who gave and lived the slogan " Ja Jawan , Jai Kisan ". Sam Manekshaw finds a place , but is not the victory over Pakistan majorly due to the astute leadership of Indira Gandhi ? With the Bofors scam not proved yet, I believe Rajiv Gandhi ought have been a great option than many of the ones nominated. A man of great vision and undoubtedly the one who sowed the seeds of the current IT boom in India. I do not know how many would agree with me but I would say Dr.Manmohan Singh should have found a place ahead of many , simply for the profound impact his economic polices have had on us. If only it was not for the arm twisting coalition politics he would have been on much higher ground, the nuclear deal is one such example.
Do not want to sound regionalistic but I do see the typical north domination on the south. If it is not for the mass appeal and the universal recognition of Rajani Kanth he might not have found a place. The greatest actor India has ever produced ought be Kamal Hasssan , it surprises me that due care was taken to have representation from all fields, and Kamal is excluded from the Arts category.
Satyajit ray is unparalleled and hence we find him in the list, but apart from him no other technician seems to have made the cut. Quite a many south film greats do not find a place, might be the over reaching connect of Hindi Cinema, but it does not make them any less Indian being part of regional cinema.
The one category that i am most happy with is "Entrepreneurs & Idea Leaders ", no complains on the ones included but might be a couple more could have been added.
If Milkha Singh, why not P.T.Usha ? why are not any of the great spin quartet or for that matter any of Indian Spinner included where in they were the key for majority if not all of Indian victories. Do not want to comment upon inclusion of Kanshi ram because not to flirt with controversy, but if Kanshiram is why not Anna Durai ? Does impact north means impacting India ?
I know 50 nominations cannot include every one and there ought be a few omissions which might not have made the cut, but its the inclusion of the few at the cost of exclusing few others who deserves for the sake of mere representation and perspective bias that does not sit with me well.

Anyways lets wait and see who gets shortlisted to the top ten .

Guilt

I never meant to hurt you,

Nor was i aware of it,

Your smile always concealed your pain,

I was a fool not to realise your emotional drain,

It makes me feel pathetic thinking of it,

That I stooped down so low

I was always assured by your eternal glean,

but it never struck me that i was not so clean,

Forgive me dear for what I did,

I should not have made your experience so torrid,

Would have set myself straight,

had I picked up on your trait,

I was blinded by something else,

It might be the magnanimity of being with you,

that out of world feel I always had with you around,

made me to loose my basic sense,

spoiling our companionship's essence,

But i would not give any excuse,

all i call for is a truce,

I am down with a real sense of guilt,

bottom down to the hilt,

Forgive me dear for what all I did,

For all the times I backslid,

I realise thinking of me makes you disgust,

what do i do to bring back the trust ?

I am on my knees, seeking forgiveness,

For every passing moment is making me feel restless,

It is only you that can pull me out of this misery,

and give me a chance to show my chivalry,

Your beaming countenance makes me survive,

allowing me to live and thrive,

Would do anything to bring back that lost cheer,

which is always an ever lasting souvenir,

One chance is all I want,

do consider this with your ever forgiving heart.

I hope to bring back those days,

enriched with trust and happy lit rays.

The Reply

What  do you wait for ? what do you anticipate ?
Oh Heart ! what is it that you yearn for ?
Every passing moment makes you so restless !
Making the situation all the more hopeless,
Is all this anticipation just for a reply ?
but it isn’t just “Just” but much more than that,
It is a confirmation that the dear one is safe
an assurance that the  other one cares,
a continuance for further conversation,
a promise of companionship when you need one,
Alas ! all these feelings are futile,
unless the the dear ones considers them worthwhile
What do I do now ?
Do I continue in pain for the reply,i
or ignore everything and be in my own self ?
but withdrawing to self also seem to cause pain,

for i fail to find a place in self without her !

The Paradox of waiting

Why is Life such a Paradox ?

Many a times forces me to do something Unorthodox,
I am really in a tight fix,
But unable to pull out any thing from my bag of tricks,
Sometimes the road ahead seems to be a freeway,

But always keep wondering is it the right way ?

At the end of tunnel i see some light,
I reach it and realise it is not actually bright,
There is someone who is so dear,
I did say that I do love her,
alas, there is someone who she seems to prefer,
I decide to wait and see what life has to offer,
I do not know if she would ever be mine,
Surely this feeling does not put me on cloud nine,
But I always been an Eternal dealer in hope,
Always looking out and see what could be in my scope,
Although the wait sometimes is so frustrating,
there seems to be something in it that I am loving,
But these small moments are not something I would settle for,
For what i Dream is something lovelier than what is now on offer,
I dream , I hope and I believe while i lie here in Wait,
for I know she would walk into my life with a beautiful gait.
                                                                                                     

Waiting for you !

Oh dear , where are you ?
I really do not have any clue,
It was only yesterday that we spoke,
Not catching up with you today is making me broke, 
Every passing second makes me anxious,
My heart is becoming so restless,
I try to diverge and concentrate on my work,
but your thoughts are making me go berserk,
I repeatedly look at the chat and the Face book,
For any update from you that I can have a look,
I spend some time reviewing your page,
How many times I did it I cannot gauge,
how much I hope the picture on it turns into reality,
and you are there in front of me in actuality,
I know it is not practically possible,
But a message pop is something plausible,
I wait here in anticipation,
somebody please give me a suggestion,
I want to reach out to her,
but how do i do ? i cannot concur.
Something like a Bluetooth is what my heart prefers,
Transmitting the feelings from mine to hers.


                                                                                         - Eternal Enigma

How do i make her feel ?

Oh GOD, It is really frustrating,

To a point that it is no more enthralling.

Here is the girl I truly love,

And she does not realise that somehow,

She knows that I love someone,

But why can’t she understand that she is the one,

I know it is not mere flirting,

But this love stricken heart is really hurting,

What do I do, how do I make her feel?

That she is the one that can truly heal,

I believe I got to give it some time,

To test and see that the feeling is truly sublime,

I say to my heart “Buddy, cool down”

Else you are going to have a breakdown.

I hope that all through this wait,

There is no one else, who comes to her for a date,

I keep my fingers crossed, oh GOD!

For you are the one that got to give the final nod.

                                                                                   - Eternal Enigma

how do i say that i love her ?

do not know how to say,

or is it that i should first pray, 

GOD you know what I want,

and it is only you who can grant,

Seeing her is always a treat,

and my Heart misses a beat

If loving some one isn't a crime,

why does the pain worsen along with time,

i want her to always be in touch,

for i really do love her very much,

I know that I really need her,

but would she vouch me for,

how do I  make my feelings know ?

my fears and inhibitions are spoiling the show,

Should I bring forth my rhetoric skills,

but I do not know if this trick saves or kills,

or is it better to be plain and straight,

I know that is my natural trait,

So i believe I would directly face her,

and say “ Dear I truly love you than any one I did ever “

                                                                                                      - Eternal Enigma

examination !!

Today i have my first examination,
the subject in question is Communication,
tried using all my little tricks and techniques of yore,
to help me reach the other shore,
Had to endure a sleepless night,
with the hope that tomorrow would be bright,
No time to write any more verse,
if i continue the effect would be adverse,
Here i bid fare well for the night,
To wake up and set on my way for another plight.

                                                                                       - Eternal Enigma

World is Round....

Was sitting idle surfing through the TV channels and happened to catch some Tennis action,inadvertently happened to recollect the statement given by Evan Lendl I believe after his yet another unsuccessful Wimbledon effort " Grass is for Cows ", this made me wonder what Bjorn Borg would have reacted when he heard that. He was quite successful at Wimbledon until one Mr.John McEnroe came along.It is pity that he called it quits so early in his career after realising that even he can be defeated. Well not a great sporting gesture i believe which reminds of Bobby Fisher the great Chess champion who declined to defend his title against Karpov because of a superinflated ego that none can challenge him. And when you talk about chess, every Indian remembers only one name , Vishwanathan Anand. He is truly a great champion ventured and made an impact in a sport which no other Indian has ventured into earlier. One such Indian who ventured into totally a different unknown sport is Narain Karthikeyan,and when the topic is about Formula 1, it is unquestionably the "Red Baron" Schumacher that you remember. He really had his sway until Alonso was able to stop the Ferarri Juggernaut,irrespective of the fact that I do not like this guy, have to accept that he really has tenacity second to none, might be the Spanish blood effect and when you talk about Spain the first thing that comes to mind is the Bull Fighting. Ahh so mighty bulls, wonder how are they are so robust, does eating grass gives them so much strength ??  Grass,,, ah well it is at this point my mind realised that all this flow of thought started with " Grass" courts of Wimbledon. Hmm,,, its a full circle...i believe i can use this and prove the world is round..no need to go on a long voyage like Magellan to prove it,, hey heey ....our thoughts and their flow,,sometimes truly weired :-)

Broken String, really ???

One notion imbibed in me since child hood has been “United we stand , divided we fall”. All through my life i have encountered and known incidents where in once divided things were never the same again and it becomes much more difficult to reconcile.The bigger the parties involved the difficult to rejoin. Imagine a future where in India and Pakistan live in harmony, but still they would remain to be two separate entities.When i first heard about the cause of separate Telengana the first thought which came to my mind is why do we need to separate when everyone speak Telugu.Is not the division of India into states basing on Language enough ???  My parents have always shielded me from the evils of Caste,creed and religion.I grew up to be an Indian whose mother tongue is Telugu, Apart from these there was not any other identity for me.

But with the issue of separate statehood i involuntarily had to develop a separate identity of being a Andhrite settled in Hyderabad, the cynosure of all the people asking for a separate Telengana. I have been reduced to find an identity of me being from Telengana by virtue of me being born and brought up in Hyderabad, or ,me being from Andhra by the virtue of my lineage.This got me to develop a unique identity of being a Hyderabadi irrespective of a separate state or not. Well that sounded separatist and to overcome that i always consoled myself of still being an Indian who spoke Telugu.All this while i lived in an assumption that rest of the common telugites are of the same feeling and still want a United state.I have had innumerable debates with my friends and colleagues in office but it was all in good humour. Just trying to pull each other’s legs and poking fun. It was more of a debate practice for us rather than a serious issue in spite of we having our own  personal prejudices.

Well something happened today,which did disturb me. i was enjoying my evening happy hours with my colleagues and having tea. And as usual we started of debating on the Telengana issue. It wasnt serious but as usual just poking fun at each other and trying to irritate the other on the issue, suddenly a man walked up well built and cajoled us as to why there would not be a separate Telengana. We tried covering it up saying it was all on a lighter note and all of us are pro Telengana. it took some sort of casual talk and assurance of sort from my buddies to convince him not to discuss further on that. I know i had a close save and any rush of adrenaline on my part would have created an issue at that spot. I donot know if i should have stood up and be on my point or did a smart thing by not speaking any thing. But the bigger question which came to my mind is that will this be the same scenario in the future. Would i have to always live with this difference, This was not what i ever imagined, me needing to hide my lineage in my own city which i always loved. This was not the only one incident, over the past few months i have encountered couple of incidents were in people unknown to me in their on fanaticism of Telengana issue have been a bit rude to me.

I thought it was just a political moment kept alive by the political refugees, but off late all the incidents make me realise that the poison has spilled into the minds of the people. This makes me ask is it that the strings have really broken or is it that I am undergoing a brief period of delusion with the recent incidents and my faith in humanity still prevails and a common man still is concerned about his basic needs and not by these issues which does no good except to feed ones own self infested ego.